It’s a mystery to men. But it’s really not that complex as most men say it is. Yes, it does take a bit more effort to understand a woman’s feelings and her emotional roller coaster but a little effort can go a long way. Women are more emotionally sensitive than men and because of the heightened sensitivity, it becomes expressed more often than most people would like to see but it’s not her fault, it’s how she is created.
Note: this is mostly pertaining to committed, closed relationships but the same advice can be applied to any relationship.
So, you want to know how to avoid her bitchiness? It’s not that simple. You shouldn’t avoid it; you should understand it or it will never end. Here are five general areas you should look into to understand and yes, avoid the thunderstorm of rage.
- Lack of Attention (Avoidance)
We’ve all been through it, men and women. It’s no different the feeling of jealousy from man to woman but what sets a woman’s jealousy from a man’s is that hers is more outspoken, so to speak. Her jealousy can be manifested for many different reasons or even a few of them. She may or may not be aware of her actions nonetheless, something happened and the emotion exploded.
What makes her jealous? Something you did that you may or may not be aware – looking at other women, picking up random girls, pretty much doing something with or to other women but not so much to your own woman. Though we know it’s in a man’s biology to ogle other women and try to ‘score’ in a sense (number, kiss or sex), this is something that can be easily turned off but a lot of men choose not to and leave that switch on. Shame on you if you do! If you are in a committed relationship, be careful of where your other ‘head’ directs you because it may lead to trouble (you may not expect or want).
Lack of Attention (Avoidance)
As stupid as it sounds, women crave attention, all the time. Some women enjoy it in general while others may only want it only as a sign of appreciation. In a relationship (whether it’s casual, serious, common-law or marriage) there’s no difference, a woman will do things to receive appreciation from her man. Such things can be getting a new hair-do or buying sexy lingerie. Sure, it makes her feel good to do these things for herself but honestly, the main reason why she does it is to have her man notice that she’s taking care of herself for him. Stupid, you think? Shouldn’t she do things for herself, you say? Truth be told, she does it for you and you should take note of these things.
Most men try to avoid these situations because it’s ‘silly’ but is it silly when your woman loses herself and gains 200 pounds and looks fugly? No, because you don’t want a fugly woman (and no woman wants a fugly man) which is why she does these silly things – she makes you look good. So will it hurt to pay a bit more attention to a woman who tries to make you look good? No, so don’t avoid her and show more appreciation for the things that she does for you. Otherwise, her wrath will emerge.
This is a really important factor in any relationship and a lot of times it’s forgotten. Women like to talk and in some instances, they talk a lot. Men will often tune out a woman if they find the subject of discussion is boring. It irritates a woman when her man ignores her in this sense because this is her way to communicate with him. Men communicate in different ways with other men; a nod and a few words exchanged is enough of a conversation.
Like it or not, do not ignore your woman’s words because it will come up again in a later discussion. A part of communicating is to understand each other – thoughts and feelings. If you don’t express your needs there will be a lot of miscommunication and misunderstanding. This leads to many arguments and some irresolvable. Of course, with communication there needs to be compromise which you and your partner should discuss with each other. One person cannot have all their needs met and ignore the other. Remember, in a relationship there are two individuals and much compromise is needed.
This should be both ways. Like communication, both sides need to be met with the same amount of respect. Respecting a person doesn’t mean that you won’t treat the person badly, it also means considering their feelings as a person. What one person does wrong is fair game for the other to do as well. So if you don’t agree with your partner doing one thing, don’t do it yourself.
In order to respect one another, guidelines need to be set and followed. As a man, you think you don’t need to follow rules because they don’t apply to you. Well, tough luck. Rules apply to everyone no matter what the situation. If you decide to cheat (physically or emotionally) don’t be surprised if your woman does it too. If you hate it, too bad, that’s your fault because you didn’t respect her enough to NOT cheat.
It’s a hard thing to hear, the truth. Men have the ability to hold in their feelings in more than women but we all experience the painful sting of the truth. We hide it because we feel we don’t want to hurt the other person or because we feel guilty of something we did. Either way, it needs to come out regardless of the outcome and end result.
If the truth is something that may hurt the person but can easily be solved by communicating, there should be no worry in the outcome or end result. For example, your girlfriend gained a few pounds and you felt she is becoming less attractive to you. You still love her but wished she would shed some weight not only for you but for her health as well. Remember, don’t tell her she is sexually unattractive – it kills her self-esteem and confidence, so will that really make her work at it? No. Most likely she will do things to spite you. Communicate how you feel and what you can DO together to make things work and make both of you happy.
If you are guilty of committing a wrong doing (ex. Cheating), and you know it will hurt your girl, you are still obligated to tell her. Even if you care for her, the chances of saving the relationship will depend on if she can forgive you (and you not commit anymore wrong doing). Otherwise, if you continue bad behavior, you will lose her, so don’t expect a good outcome.
This may seem like a lot of information to keep track of and process in your mind, that’s really not an excuse. These five simple factors will keep your relationship healthy and happy. I’m not saying rush into getting to know everything, take it one step at a time. A little effort goes a long way.